An Expat View.

Almost eleven years have passed since the momentous day we decided to move, lock stock and barrel to Cyprus. A lot of water has passed under the bridge since then, and down the pan, if you catch my drift. 
In an effort to not cause embarrassment to any of my co-expats I'm changing names here and there. Some don't care, and some are no longer with us, so the names remain.

Coming from an industrial type background I had insight into work practices and the 'why can't it be done yesterday ' attitudes of the south east of England so there were a few surprises coming my way to be sure.

To say, in 2004 when we came, that Cyprus was a 'laid-back' country is somewhat of an understatement, the truth is, I couldn't believe my eyes at times, and some attitudes perplexed me.
After our first weekend, in  a hotel, we moved into a house not far away on a not yet completed estate, ours being one of the first. Several things were a bit out of whack, we had a front wall, and a gate, but the path was unmade, we had a door, with a lock, but from inside no handle to open it, so one had to struggle with the key, turned slightly, to open it. We had a downstairs shower, but no rail or curtain, so we couldn't use it. The pavement along the road was unmade, so we had to walk in the road for fear of breaking an ankle, but Hey! it's November, the sun is shining and in the day it's quite warm. Nice for us brits. Locally, the bars are good, open late, and the beer's cold and cheap! What more could you ask?

The builder was still around, so we asked him about these things, "When are we going to get a path?" and "How about the handle on the door?" Stock answer. "I come tomorrow and fix it", which of course never happened and we were actually moving out a month later when he came to put the door handle on! Cyprus... Gotta love it! 

There are some strange attitudes to life as well, we discovered, whilst looking for a more affordable long term property. The rental market here is quite strange, and the purchase market even more so, but that's another story, as we weren't looking to buy. 
In 2004 Cyprus still had their Pound, which was, at the time worth more than sterling, about  £ 1.20 each, and rentals varied a great deal, dependant on the area. We were paying cyp450 a month for the house, but found a 2 bed apartment, overlooking the sea, with central heating for the winter (Yes, it does get quite cold here) for only cyp260, quite a saving,and a nice area and a super landlord (also hard to find here).

 My first proper job here was in a car wash (one does what one has to to pay the rent) and mighty hard it was too for a 50 something year old, but it paid pretty well, and it was opposite our apartment block, so convenient. I was on 'detailing' , leathering off and hoovering inside.

One day whilst waiting for the next car I was chatting to a youngster (20ish) about what he's doing etc. He said he was at college going on to uni to study some high faluting subject, so I said, "What is your goal in life then? What do you want to achieve? " he sat for half a minute, deep in thought, and then replied, "I want a Mercedes or a BMW!" I was gobsmacked to say the least. Thankfully the next car came from the wash so I could gracefully excuse myself and continue working, but not without a huge grin! How sad was that?


We were a bit concerned when the government decided to adopt the Euro, the exchange rate was quite harsh, and because of that (€1.74 to the cyp) prices seemed to almost double overnight, and although the sensible amongst us realised it's just a number, to go from

paying 1cyp for a pint on Saturday to €1.74 on Monday was hard on the grey matter! The good news, of course was that  my wages also followed the same pattern!

There were some instances of 'profiteering' but the eagle eyed and quick witted amongst us soon put a stop to that locally, as our local shopkeepers relied on our custom, and knew that bad news travels fast!
I'm sure it would happen, has happened, in any country that adopts the Euro, but 'People Power' can help.

Up until fairly recently (the last three or four years ) Health and Safety was an unheard of concept here, and you would regularly see young brown fellas climbing 40 or 50 foot palm trees with only a couple of lengths of broomstick and a bit old rope as a ladder inching their way up with a razor sharp knife tucked in the back pocket of their shorts, to cut the dead leaves off.

It was also not unusual to see someone up a ladder 20 or so feet leaning out sideways to cut branches using a petrol chainsaw one handed! The 'dead man's switch ' disabled to allow this to happen.

Scaffolding generally used is like frames that slot into one another and these can be built up to any height. I've seen them four or five stories high, and tied into the wall only twice or three times in a span of about 40mtr. It's nothing unusual to see an odd block of wood or a brick propping up one corner, because of a hollow or hole in the ground!

Now here's one that never used to fail to crack me up. The Police. They have changed dramatically in the last few years but when we first came it was quite fun. In the bar at 2:30 and the barman would get a phone call, he would signal the Karaoke to stop, the music would go off, and all would be quiet. The police would come in, having been told about the loud music, find it all quiet, and go speak with the boss, who would crack a couple of Carlsbergs open, and all would be well with the world! I kid you not. There have also been a few(?) cases where friends of mine have been stopped at around 3 in the morning and asked"Have you been drinking?" "Yes" "How many beers?" "Dunno, 6 or 7" "Where do you live?" "'Bout a kilometre up the road" "Well drive safely the rest of the way! Goodnight."    Yes, it's true! 
But give credit where credit's due the clear up rate for crime is very good in Cyprus and this was explained to me by a C.I.D officer whom I happened to come into contact with a few years ago (that story to follow!) Cyprus is a smallish island, and with the north separated, even smaller, and crooks are generally low intelligence sort of creatures, that quite often like to brag about their 'adventures' in their local bar, what they don't realise is that policemen have friends and relations all over, and communities are quite tight knit, so bragging in a bar whilst under the influence may well seem pretty macho, but it inevitably leads to an early morning knock on the door with a battering ram, closely followed by the aforementioned policemen, with nice shiny adjustable bracelets, case closed your honour!

I'm quite taken by old buildings, and I love to wander about the 'old town' just looking. It gives me food for thought that some of the buildings are more than 100 years old, and still there, albeit a little dilapidated in some cases. And sitting opposite the castle, with a cold beer thinking how they managed to build the thing, how labour intensive it must have been, how long it took, and the extreme skills that went into the perfection of it, and that was before Richard the Lionheart came with Berengaria!

I love places like this, meet Christakis Konstantinou, he's probably had that shop and done the same thing every day for the last 60 odd years, speaks very little English(don't blame him, we should learn his language, we live in his country) and the only thing that's probably changed is the stock, and I’d bet that if you rummaged in the back you'd find something  that’s been there forever. Bet he still closes early Wednesday and Saturday and never opens on Sunday.

There are lots of places like this one too, never eaten at one, but I'm told they are wonderful. Good food, plenty of it, and reasonably priced. Places like this generally don't open until 6 or 7 at night and stay till the wee hours.
Tables and chairs are just household items and are left out all the time. Amazingly they never disappear. Nothing fancy here, and no need for there to be. These places are never populated by the well to do young set, older generations gather, eat and talk old times here. Restaurants menus, written obviously in Greek and then translated into English are a source of endless amusement, with such delicacies as God goujons, paper steak and god and chips as regular items with one offering 'Deep fried code' in the fish section, a meal for spies perhaps?

I just had to put this one in, it so often happens that you get just this sort of question asked by visitors. I have to say, yes it is great to wake up to sunshine nearly all year round, but after 4 months or more of 35-45 degrees C in the shade, and having to work in it, it does get a little wearing and we do celebrate the odd shower, or cooler breeze when we get the opportunity, not very often in the summer months unfortunately, plus we have to put up with water cuts periodically, because all of our water comes via dams in the mountains, which are rapidly depleted in hot times. But it is surprising that you acclimatise fairly quickly to it. When we came in November we found it quite pleasant, temperatures in the low 20's or so, quite warm after England in October/ November, but by the February, we were feeling it a bit more. The first summer was hard to take, but  we soldiered on and put up with it the best we could, still in holiday mode, it was cold beers whenever but that fades, and then you encounter your first winter here. Let me tell you 15°C is mighty cold when you just spent 7 months in 30odd C!

All in all it's been a good experience,as far as I'm concerned anyway, to live here in Cyprus and I'm really glad we did it, my only regret is we didn't do it earlier. There are some funny quirks that you have to get used to, like it's still a paper society, and everything has to be done on reams and reams of forms, like they must use half a rain forest every year here churning out forms, and explanatory notes for forms, and explanatory notes for the explanatory notes! It is changing, and I'm into Cypriot ways enough that it really doesn't bother me that it's a painfully slow transition, but they will wake up one day, maybe.  


Just had a boozy afternoon at a local, the entertainment was great, someone had left a 2-seater, 3-seater and a matching armchair out by the bins, and this happens quite often. Well, along comes old fella and his missus in a little mazda 2- door hatch, and decide this would look very nice in their room, so they ask the bar owner, can they take it, he says, "nothing to do with me" and so here we go, first the armchair, there’s a bit hanging out, but no matter, second, after half an hour they come back, this time for the three seater..... in a Mazda 2-door hatch... I kid you not, they did it, with three quarters of the thing hanging out the back, half hour later, the 2-seater. Good luck is all we can say, and enjoy!